Happy Birthday Sissy!

You’ve had a birthday shout hooray! We want to sing to you today! One year older and wiser too! Happy Birthday to you!

My big sister Elise turned 23 today. Fortunately for her, she gets to spend it with her sweet husband, Mark, in Colorado. Unfortunately for my family and I, we don’t get to celebrate with them. I love you, Leesie. Here’s a little birthday gift from your little sis!

Up until the family moved to Utah in 2001, Elise and I shared a bedroom. Elise will tell you that there were times she wanted to wring my neck…that statement would be accurate. Being the active little 9 year old that I was, I enjoyed tagging along with my big sis. Although many of my memories of Oregon are beginning to dim, there are many I feel will permanently stay with me forever; many of which include afternoons spent with Elise in our room. Elise and I would sing and dance to our different CD’s, most notably, “Disney Classics”, Steps, and Celine Dion’s Christmas album in December. Elise would even indulge my pleas to put in my favorite childhood group: S Club 7. I sometimes wonder if this next game was actually suggested by my mother as I’m not sure how it ever got started. I had trouble learning how to read and write when I was younger (thankfully that went away after 3^rd grade). Anywho, I remember my mom making me read books every night and practice writing (I wasn’t always too thrilled in the activity). Oddly enough, however, Elise and I made up this game we called “Blockbuster”. In essence, we’d copy down the bios off of movies we owned and had “customers” call in wanting to buy them. We’d use the many telephones my toy box held and played “manager and secretary”. Guess who each played each role? (Yes, grandma, I’ve been playing secretary all my life) We loved that game and spent hours upon hours playing it. I remember playing pirates on our deck. Most of those memories have dimmed, but I do remember always getting out a jump rope, the tire pressure thingy, and the squirt guns…and I think my Barbie bouncy ball (we are very creative girls – even then). I remember our nightly “goodnight” routine. It went something like this:

Elise: Goodnight

Megan: Goodnight

Elise: I love you

Megan: I love you too

Elise: Sleep tight…

Megan: Don’t let the bed bugs bite

As the little sister, I must put this plug in because it still annoys me to this day. Elise would always have to be the one to start it. In fact, she wouldn’t respond if I tried. The perks of being the big sister…I remember the rules we each put in place when one of us got scared in the middle of the night. We could crawl into bed with each other, but we had to wake the other before doing so. While we lived in Oregon, I remember (too often mom and dad would care to know) when we’d wake up in the middle of the night and “sneak” into our family room and fall asleep watching Disney channel together. I remember watching “Mama’s Family” and “Saved by the Bell” in the mornings before school. I remember seeing Elise with her friends on the playground and wanting to be just like her one day. I remember her holding my hand as we drove away from the only home I knew of in Oregon. I remember the first few nights living in Utah and being afraid of sleeping in my own room alone. I remember many times “sneaking” past my parents room, quietly opening her door, and waking her up so I could crawl in bed with her. I remember going into her room while she did homework and wishing I had some to do with her. As we got older, I remember her driving me to school each day. It was on one of those mornings that she introduced me to “Dream Big” by Ryan Shupe and the Rubber Band and “You Gotta Be” by Des’ree. It was those two songs that often got us through many difficult times in both of our teenage experiences. Elise was my go to person when I felt upset or self-conscious during junior high – which if I’m being honest here, was QUITE often. I remember going to girl’s camp and feeling comforted knowing she was there when I needed her – which again, was often. I remember when she left for college and how scared I was because she wouldn’t be down the hall anymore; she’d be 2 ½ hours away in Logan. I remember being upset at how our relationship slowly changed as we both grew up without being together. I remember getting the phone call in quilted bear telling me she was engaged. I remember going wedding dress shopping and seeing the excitement in her eyes as she tried on the many dresses in which she’s spend her special day in. I remember the look in her eyes when she talked about how much she loved her fiancé. I know how much she loves him. I know how much she loves being a wife. I know how much she loves our family – despite its quarks. I know she’s a good friend. I know she’s a tremendous sister. I know I wouldn’t be the same without her. Although the latter is somewhat of a cliché statement, the statement is entirely true. She helped make my childhood memorable, she held my hand when my little life changed at age 9, she made me smile when I felt lonely in junior high, she offered advice when I felt discouraged in high school, and she believes in who I am today. She sees the good in me. She sees who I have the potential to become. She encourages me to do what I want, despite the obstacles that come into the picture. She indulges me when I’m frazzled. She listens to me when I cry. She cheers me on when I succeed. Elise and I are different people in different life stages with different goals and ideas. Not all of her dreams are mine and vice versa. However, we’re each other’s advocates; we’re friends; we’re sisters. We’re a part of a family that’s working together to make each other better and stronger. I’m thankful to her. I’m thankful she’s added more to our little family by marrying Mark. Mark, we all love you and above all, love the way you treat our daughter and sister.

Elise, I love you. Believe in yourself and what you can do. Remember your family loves you and prays for you. Eat something extremely unhealthy today and be proud of it...and always wear a helmet.

Happy Birthday and Cheers to the Loving Sisters!

Loves!

Brenda

On Saturday September 24, 2011, my sassy and loveable Aunt Brenda passed away in a motorcycle accident. It was quite the shock for everyone that had the privilege of knowing her. In the difficult weeks that followed, I observed the strength of my family as we came together to mourn and grieve. I was allotted the chance to see the miraculous effect she’d made on the lives of her friends, clients, neighbors and yes, even puppies. Although the weekend we buried our Brenda was terribly difficult, I was greatly privileged to be among magnificent souls and caring individuals who paid their respects as we said goodbye to a long lost treasure in all of our lives.

To my family – how much I love you! Once again I’m struck with awe at the faith my parents, specifically my dad; who in situations such as these that could test your faith, have never wavered. I admire your testimony. I respect your courage when you say goodbye, but surely know it’s not the end. I marvel at my grandparents who proudly stood in behalf of their daughter and graciously accepted condolences and warm-wishes despite the pain so clearly visible in their eyes. I look up to both their examples and vigor. To my terrific uncle and devoted aunts that are left to carry on without their beloved sister, you all will be okay. While the pain and heartache seem unimaginable at times, may you remember that it’s not the end and soon enough, we will all be reunited with our Brenda. The valor in which each of you hold have helped and continue to help each member of the family in ways which are indescribable. To my own beautiful sisters – Melina and Elise – I love you both! Life goes by so quickly. May each of us remember to take the time to always be included in each other’s lives. You never know when the time will come that God wants one of us back with Him. I’m so thankful that families are forever. I couldn’t imagine spending an ounce of eternity without one of you! It wouldn’t be the same without grandma and grandpa’s hugs, Wayne’s humor, Lori’s stories, Shauna’s smile, Jenny’s unconditional love, Connie’s devotion, and Sara’s loyalty. Most importantly right now, it wouldn’t be the same if we didn’t get to hear Brenda’s laugh every day. While being separated hurts now, it renews my testimony of eternal families.

For those of you, who never knew my aunt, let me tell some things about her. Brenda loved life! She had the most jolly and cheerful laugh; probably the most infectious laughter I’d ever heard. She was fiercely independent. She had vigor for life that is uncommon to find. She was passionate. She was giving; she gave even when she had nothing to give. She opened her home to anyone in need. She truly loved her neighbor as herself. She added her own spice to life and never let the many obstacles and trials that came into it affect her. Her attitude she carried throughout her life is one I hope to develop as I push forward on my own path.

Brenda taught me many things; some only handy for a fun Saturday night and others that will be valuable my entire life. Many of these lessons were learned while she was alive, but many were also learned after her death. She taught me how to gamble on a slot machine. She taught me how to burn CD’s from a computer. She taught me that in order to be a perfect Halloween witch; you must have the perfect cackle. She taught me that despite what any “Clegg Family Christmas Gift Chart” said, you give presents to your favorite nieces (aka myself and sissy’s). J She taught me that however long or short a trip is I will always wear a helmet. She taught me that it’s okay to cry. She taught me how to stay positive in a situation that looks bleak. She taught me what it means to be faithful to your family. Although she didn’t always agree with the decisions of others, she supported them without fail. She taught me it’s okay to work on projects. She taught me how to have fun. After seeing the tremendous effect she had on the lives of her friends, she taught me what it means to not only be a friend, but be a good one too. The value she placed on friendship is one of the greatest lessons she’s left behind for me to follow. I was so touched by how loved and missed she was by her friends at the funeral and memorial BBQ held in her honor at her home. It takes somebody very special to get a motorcycle procession at her funeral and compel one’s friends to drive 3-5 hours to a small town Idaho funeral. Life is short and therefore I must take every second and live it to the fullest. This is probably the biggest lesson I’ve learned from Brenda thus far. When she wanted to do something, she went right along and did it. She lived her life. She worked hard, played harder, and loved hardest.

I heard it once said that for every person you meet on earth, you have double the people cheering you on on the other side. I was promised that “angels would be my companions” as I walked my path through mortality. It gives me great strength and hope to know that Brenda is now one of those angels holding my hand and cheering me on. She was a huge supporter while she lived with me on Earth; I can only imagine how that’s grown now that she’s reached the other side. Lately, I’ve found myself thinking “I wonder what Aunt Brenda is saying right now...I bet she’s laughing” or she’s saying “I know it hurts, but get up and deal with it anyways” or “eat that Oreo – it’ll make you feel better!” That’s the kind of person Brenda was: determined, courageous, fun, and full of laughs & giggles. She lived in the “now” and was overall, happy.

Though Brenda had many fine qualities, she was far from perfect (as all of us are). She made mistakes too. What made the difference is she learned from them. She led a hard life, but walked it with a smile on her face. Brenda Godfrey is therefore one of my many heroes. It takes a person of incredible audacity to live as she did.

As life “moves on” without Brenda, I hope the lessons and example she left behind will be remembered. I know I will cherish my memories with her. I anxiously look forward to when I get to hear that laugh again. I know she is watching over me and our family and she’s exactly where she needs to be. I hope through my actions I make her proud. Like her, I am not perfect. I’ve made and make mistakes a lot. Too often it takes multiple lessons for me to learn what God has intended. Still, like my Aunt, you take it one step at a time, one day at a time, and never forget to wear your smile. As Brenda grew, people saw her change of heart. I hope that as I continue to grow up, those important to me can see my growth. My prayer is to develop the same love and zest for life that Brenda had. I pray I can be the kind of friend she was – even when I make mistakes. I pray to be the kind of sister she was; a sister who could always be depended on. I love you, Brenda. And as they say, “God be with you ‘til we meet again”

Loves!